Xander: Different Skins
by Skoellya Seyth
Summary: Xander is trapped in a different body after receiving a curse from a Demoness. Xover with DC Comics. An answer to a request, I hope people will enjoy this. Please Review, it makes my day.
1. When scary things get scared, not good

**I am writing this story idea by request, and I decided to take it as a challenge to see if I could meet the expectations with my quality of work. Please feel free to do the same as I enjoy writing and I love a difficult task. Be aware it probably won't be on my list of priorities (got places to go, things to see, coursework to finish, essays to write) but I'll do my best. I thought it was a great idea for a crossover, so here I am, figuratively speaking of course and I was honoured to be asked to write something. AU. I can't remember the specifics of the series after the first two (It's been ages since I had the chance to watch them, the box sets were kinda expensive last time I checked) but it's probably sixth season sometime. Let me know if there are any major continuity errors I'll be happy to make amendments. **

**Special thanks go to michael68 for the idea!**

**Summary: Xander is trapped in a different body after receiving a curse from a Demoness. Xover with DC Comics. **

**Disclaimer: Neither characters from BTVS or DC Comics belong to me and are the respective property of their rightful owners.

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The robot hung in star labs. The rusted metal had been repaired and chemically cleaned to a silver hue, too dull to be a mirror but light enough to give a gleam of menace. Its humanoid shape might have equalled the Joker's obscurity for all similarities it had to the rest of mankind. It was alone, locked in a room with no windows, occasionally someone might stop by to admire the workmanship or gaze in awe at what might lie within.

The head was of a helmet shape, not too dissimilar from the knights of Normandy depicted on the Bayeux Tapestry, the nose jutted out before melding with the brow and twisting inside the red glowing socket where the eyes would be on a living creature, but where the cameras were. Where the helmet should have cut off and hung into air, it clung to the skeletal ruby eyed face and twisted downwards, plating, like a skin, the neck wiring which was granted the need for better protection should the robot be needed for many battles.

The torso and arms were slender and fluid, built for allowing greater mobility while the gauntlets were armed with all the modifications the creator could give. One might say it had one or two tricks up its sleeve. The feet had a strong grip a weight to them, used for additional strength, anchorage or even solo space flights, it was a visitor from a far distant land.

Militaristic and regal it was a warrior android pure and simple. Space Junk that had landed in the nineteen sixties in a wasteland area it had been passed around from agency to agency each scientist that worked on it smashing computer screens in rage as it refused to give up it's secrets. Perhaps soon they would realise some secrets are best kept unknown.

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Xander was tired. He was human. Some may have called him weak. His friends had defended him and saved his life too many times for him to count, but they weren't here any more. They were out saving some one else, he had been left behind in the magic shop with a headache and a box of aspirin to keep him company. He wasn't a guy that liked that irony. He could have run, could have tried to escape by doing what the Scooby Gang had always done best, run and pray for some dumb luck.

The nest of vampires had come looking for Buffy, travelling thousands of miles. Instead they'd found him. But he'd be damned if he went down without taking them with him, if he couldn't survive he'd make sure Buffy would live. She was important the girl who saved the world. He tagged along, but he was ok with it. He could still get take out every week, couldn't he? _Live for me, Buffy. _He thought desperately_, if I take them with me, you have to live._

There a dozen of them. Snarling, snapping and prowling around the shelves, playing with him like he was a piece of meat thrown to a pack of hungry dogs. One might try and approach him only to be shoved back as they argued amongst themselves. Thank the saints Giles had tried to get him to take care of the equipment, instead of persuading him to become research boy again.

He slid a cross to underneath his jacket, and picked up a stake from the table where he'd been carving some more for the midnight patrols. In his other hand he held a vial of holy water he clenched it so tightly he thought he might crack it. Mustering up his courage he strode to the centre of the room.

'Hey! Dead boys and girls! Yeah, you…' The vampires were momentarily startled before they moved even closer to him than before 'guess that got their attention…' he cleared his throat 'I'm not going down without a fight.'

'I guess you wouldn't, such a brave, strong man as yourself.' A sultry voice called over at him from the entrance of the magic shop. A tall pouting brunette in a deathly regal purple dress stood framed in the doorway. She placed a hand on her hips suggestively. As the other vampires back away respectfully, she stalked up to him and whispered in his ear with a sickly sweet voice. 'Where's the Slayer?'

'In Hawaii. She can't get enough of those little umbrellas in the drinks.' Xander joked realising that moment how very dead he was. Anything vampires feared was a force to be reckoned with.

'I promise I'll make it quick…' she walked her fingers up his chest and held onto his chin, so he stared into her eyes, the fiery red eyes of a demon. This girl could rip him limb from limb, slice him into tiny pieces he didn't know what would happen but he knew from experience, anything could and most likely _would_.

'How about Italy? She likes Italian waiters got the whole tall, dark thing going for them and she always said she'd love to go to Rome.' Xander mumbled this all the while lost in the penetrating gaze of the she-demon.

'Tell me where I can find her,' the sharp voice grew in anger it was not often a man like this resisted her and then he did the unthinkable. He smashed the vial of holy water across her face revealing the true creature beneath, a writhing, white haired, fanged monster. The true face beneath someone was rarely a pretty thing.

The shrill cry of fury emanated around the room, almost splitting Xander's ears. The vampires fled in terror, because they knew what he did not. This was a mage demon and to face her wrath could be enduring the tortures of hell itself. She began chanting and advanced on Xander pulling him up by the scruff of his neck, smoke steamed from the ground and the lights shorted out as the mystical energy absorbed the electricity.

As the mage demon nearly completed the spell she spoke in English to Xander 'You will suffer as I have suffered, dying slowly beneath a false skin I condemn you to agony before meeting your fate, as you have brought me mine!'

'Sorry Xander, no offence, but that's my job.' Buffy swung an axe into the demon and she keeled over to move no more. Depositing the axe carelessly on the floor Buffy hurried to her friend. 'I saw all these vamps running out the magic shop so I thought-'

Xander allowed himself breath a sigh of relief. 'I really thought I was a goner there for sure too…'

'Glad you're not.' Buffy smiled 'You're buying popcorn tonight for the movie.' Her voice grew more serious as she felt her friend sway under her grip. 'You okay? You look a little shaky.'

'Buffy, I'll be-' it was the last thing he remembered saying with his own voice. The words rasped in his throat and he looked at Buffy with a longing pain which made her rush over to his side. The next thing he knew his head had hit the floor and he felt the breath driven from his body. He was as cold as stone. He thought this would be what it felt like if it was dead. Except his head wouldn't hurt so much…

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**Let me know what you think. Unless I get reviews this will be fairly slow going. It's a change of pace from what I usually write so I hope people enjoy :)**


	2. We're in the crime club

**I did leave you hanging there, didn't I? I'm thrilled with the response I've had (I'm kinda scared with the expectations) so I am going to make an effort to give you a bit more of a clue as to where I'm going with this. I think I'm going to post in fairly short chapters (I made this one longer for you guys) so I don't rush and I can get some feedback as to whether you think I'm going in the right direction or not or if my work needs any improvement at all. Constructive criticism is very welcome (there's a difference between that and flames); I want to improve as best I can and I'm happy to make amendments. So now on with the story… I don't need to add that I don't own any of the characters, do I?

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He awoke facing a blank wall, well; if you wanted to be particular about it, he could see all the dents and dips, the scratches and gashes of long past telling a story of a practical and well used room. He was amazed he could tell so much detail; see the flakes of plaster crumble slightly, the slight tilt of a metal doorframe which wasn't quite perpendicular. He was so amazed he nearly forgot he was hanging from an opposite wall, his head held erect fixed so all he could see was straight ahead.

Where was Buffy? Where was He? Somewhere… military? It was certainly clinical enough, the tiled floor was marked, battered and worn many feet had trodden there, but he had no idea what the purpose was. He shivered as he was reminded of the institute. He doubted he was there after Buffy was through with them, although in Sunnyhell anything was possible. He'd learned to try and remind himself of that after the incident involving the cute girl who turned out to be an inca mummy.

He tried to squint as all he noticed were different shades of red. Was he wearing those cool red shades he's seen around? No, he couldn't feel anything. So the demon had messed with his eyesight a bit. No biggie, he'd lived through worse, maybe he could see if Willow could fix it for him she was getting really good with the magic, not quite the bookworm who would help him with Math anymore although if he still took math Xander was sure she'd still help him out. That was Willow for you.

He tried turning his head and found it was stiff, like it needed to be clicked back into place. He tried moving his hands but found they were pinned to the wall. Trying to tug himself free, he found they came away, easily, too easily. Of course, it was then the sirens blared and the scientists came running into the room – then running out of it, sealing the door shut with a loud clang. He looked at them in surprise and was mildly offended. He may not be the greatest looking guy in the world like dead boy, a.k.a. Angel according to Buffy, but-

Yaaah! Xander spotted his reflection on a battered steel filing cabinet somewhere the side of him. He stared at it blankly taking in the red eyes, silver skin. His only thought was: _why do things like this always happen to me? Oh yeah. I'm a good ol' home-grown Sunnydale Scooby. _Oh Man

His voice was different. It was flat and robotic. It wasn't… _him_. He guessed his Giles impersonations were out of the window… as he tried to sigh his voice came out as a low static grumble. It had none of the lively, eager crowd pleaser comedian in him and dampened his spirits quite considerably. Nothing was his own except his thoughts.

He held up his metallic arms and tapped against the silver skin. He could feel nothing. Yet he could still "flex" his arms. He experimented a little, and tapped on the wall amazed when it suddenly dented like putty. Ok, that was weird. He looked around the room he was in; a blast door had come down and enclosed him in. He figured the politest thing might be to knock and see if anyone knew what the hell was going on.

If he allowed himself to stop and take things in he may just _break down_. And not just mentally either. He paused momentarily. So what do you know? He could still pun. No point in going all _haywire_ about it though. Stop it. He chided himself. He needed to focus but he still felt like grinning despite himself. He hadn't done _this_ one before. Soldier boy. Got it. Been possessed by a Hyena. Been there. Had a crush on his high school science teacher who just happened to be a giant preying mantis? Done that. He'd get it sorted out. They always did. The he froze. Something was very wrong.

Xander felt like crying.

He couldn't smile anymore.

It was then he first cursed the twisted helmet melded onto his face and made up his mind to get out.

He wanted to be human again.

He wanted to smile.

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'We have a break out at Star Labs.' Batman's ferocious growl surprised almost everyone in the room with its presence. Green Arrow still wasn't sure where in the shadows he was, let alone how long he had been listening to the argument he had been having with Black Canary. Ollie sighed as he knew it was just going to be one of those days he sat back with his feet crossed on the table, ignoring Dinah's glare of contempt… he then frowned.

'Don't people usually break in to Star Labs?' He asked lightly, with a raised eyebrow looking around at the League assembled around the smoothly polished conference table, with the blatant scuff marks marring the perfect image.

'Yes.' Batman seemed to think the sharp reply was enough to satisfy Ollie's curiosity.

'Ok then.' Green Arrow leant back in his chair. There was a pause throughout the room only broken by the Flash's fidgeting as he shuffled on his chair. Ollie concentrated again, a rare thing for him. He turned to where he thought Bats was. 'So what's the problem?'

'This.' Ollie jumped and then lowered his head slightly in embarrassment, ignoring the chuckles from Dinah, as Batman tapped a few keys on the display screen on the other side of the room to display an android, with a metallic silver sheen, and dim red eyes. It was obvious to everyone, the skilled workmanship, and the power built into it. They vaguely wondered which powerful race had built it, something to be feared, perhaps. Even Green Lantern did not recognise the alien technology.

'That was deactivated.' Superman turned to the Dark Knight eventually, with a curious expression. 'I was there when it was transferred, covering the story for the Daily Planet. When they found it they said it was just some space junk that had been restored, but they couldn't figure out how to power it.'

'What is its position now? Has it injured anyone?' Wonder Woman asked, concerned with the destruction such similarly powered androids had caused in the past.

'It still remains nearby the Labs and has caused an extensive amount of damage to public property. It has not injured or killed anyone as of yet, but we have no idea as to its attentions, what caused it to awake, or if this is a foreshadowing to a graver situation. It is extremely powerful and there are not many weaknesses that we know of. I suggest sending a strike team to make contact, and engage if hostile.'

They all knew Batman expected the worst… but he wouldn't be Bruce if he didn't, just like they knew Clark wouldn't be Superman if he didn't look for the best in people. Two opposites of a coin needed to balance each other out. Of course it was a notable occasion when they agreed on something which was how it appeared when Superman nodded appreciatively.

'We can't just attack it,' Green Lantern exclaimed, with surprise at Clark's acceptance.

Clearly understanding Hal's concerns, Clark reassured his friend and colleague. 'He did suggest making contact first.'

'Oh.' Green Lantern looked sheepish whilst Flash's eyes widened in fear and anticipation at the smirk just visible on Batman's face.

'Perhaps you should pay more attention in future GL.' As Batman turned for the exit, his cape swirled around him, blending him further back into the shadows concealing his smirk widening into something that might have been a smile. 'I also suggest the most effective team should include those present and I shall contact J'onn immediately.'

'Let's get going then,' Green Arrow put his feet back on and stood up swinging his quiver onto his back. He sniffed, offended, as the Black Canary refused his outstretched hand, an offer to help her up, and walked past him, causing Green Lantern to chuckle lightly. Superman might have rolled his eyes as he flew past, although one could never be sure, while Wonder Woman smiled a knowledgeable smile. The Flash must have run rings around them, impatiently, before they hurried off to deal with the latest potential crisis… not quite aware of what was waiting for them.

**To be continued…**

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**I know the Justice League meeting may seem in a different tone, but I figured they just take these kind of "normal" occurrences in their stride. Not quite sure how long I'll be with the next chapter, it is a critical point that establishes relationships etc. I'll be working on it though, I promise you that.**

**Thanks to Altharus, Luschor, NiereG, Superfan, Dracowar, Sean Malloy-1, ashez2ashes, Ronin 100, King Henry the V, Virtual Series, Crossover Addict and Night-Owl123 for either reviewing or adding this story to your alert list. Please let me know if this fails or meets your expectations!**

**As for using single quotation marks? It's a habbit of mine, I didn't realise people found it distracting I do it without thinking now. Anyone else bothered by the quotations? Talk to me here, people. **


	3. kind of like the chess club

**Hey guys I've got a new chapter for you and longer! In answer to several queries: The robot is simply a catalyst for the story; I created my own in homage to all those crazy, but unique, sixties and seventies designs in comics. Has anyone heard of the green and purple suit Lex Luthor used to wear? It's a classic ;) Anyways, once I get past the initial story line the robot might come into play a little more, I have a few ideas floating around. My other purpose in creating a quite generic and common Robot design is to show some inventiveness to solutions and have Xander more reliant on character, skill and intuition to get the job done without using gimmicks like special scanners or something and there are a few surprises planned. I also didn't want to burden him with someone else's personality to deal with as well; he has it tough enough as it is. ****To distinguish Xander's robotic speech I highlighted it in bold and italics.**

**And to clear up the Justice League roster: Dinah Lance is the Black Canary (she also has a history with Ollie), Diana Prince is Wonder Woman (although I'm not sure if she _has_ a secret id anymore...) I should get around to explaining more about them or writing parts of their families/histories in as Xander gets to know everyone better. But for now… as always… nothing is mine. Except the robot.

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J'onn J'onzz, the Martian Manhunter, one of the most, some might have argued the most, powerful telepath on the planet, joined the League assembled outside the labs. His green skin stood out amongst the natural dusty grass tones of the landscape. The blue cape and red cross across his chest was a familiar symbol for the gathered group of heroes, he was a steadfast and powerful member with many years experience and he had earned an aura of respect about him. Surveying the scene, he was enjoying the fact that his adopted home planet was not in any great danger for today although he knew better than to be complacent.

Superman and Flash were already picking their way through the rubble, cleaning up the damage and looking for evidence, all the while having a high speed conversation. Green Arrow and Green Lantern were arguing over the weaponry used to cause the damage whilst Wonder Woman started scouting the perimeter for signs of the android. Black Canary was talking to the dishevelled director about what he knew of the robot, which wasn't anything not already covered by Batman in the brief.

The Dark Knight stood in shadows keenly observing the desolate area, the staff having become used to evacuating on short notice, tire tracks still visible on the dirt track. He noticed Batman's curious aura, as if he was confused by something, not common for the blight of Gotham's criminal underworld. J'onn asked silently, _what is the matter my friend?_

J'onn could feel Batman's pointed glare at the word _friend_, but he stood his ground and looked meaningfully at the Dark Knight. Sighing inwardly, Batman explained telepathically. _It isn't deliberate destruction._

Surprised, J'onn surveyed the wreckage of the complex they had arrived at. The cluster of buildings where the robot had obviously escaped from had walls blasted apart, but it was not where you would have expected should it have wanted the buildings to collapse or be obliterated. A portion of the ceiling had fallen in but it was at the edge as if the force had been directed at empty air, much of the partition indoor walls intact. Batman had noted and categorised this in an instant, J'onn was always surprised by his fiercely analytical mind.

'J'onn, see if you can sense any sentience.' Batman's deep voice rang clear over the empty green fields surrounding the laboratories.

J'onn's brow furrowed as he scanned the area telepathically. 'I can not find any unusual signatures…'

'Search again,' Batman stated, watching his colleague closely. He had a theory and he needed his colleagues to use their abilities to their full capability to confirm his suspicions, he was rarely, if ever, wrong. On impersonal matters anyway.

J'onn flinched in surprise as he found who he was searching for. 'It is human- it's consciousness is a human- he's in great distress,'

Batman's face became grave, when he'd had his suspicions of sentience he'd assumed it was an alien not of his earth, like the creation. After berating himself for such an incorrect assumption he quickly ran through possible scenarios and silently groaned as it meant only one thing: magic. Closing his eyes in a pained expression for a moment, his head snapped round to face the League and he quickly issued a plan of action, with a human psyche at least it would be somewhat more predictable once he could analyse the state of mind.

'We're dealing with a human consciousness encased within, approach with caution he does not have full control over the armaments. I suggest the most invulnerable approach first.' Batman cocked his head slightly as he addressed Wonder Woman via his headset 'Diana, do you have a precise location?'

Wonder Woman floated in the air currents gazing down on the trail of charred grassland that led to a small glade of trees. She could faintly see a faint outline of the slim mechanical being sat in a small hollow she started as a sudden thin, precise, stream of red light cut down a tree. She thought she heard what might have passed for a disgruntled groan through a speaker grill before she flew up higher in the sky to avoid detection. 'He's about two kilometres due south from your position, I'm going to approach and see if I can talk to him'

'He could be hostile.' Green Lantern reasoned over the comm. 'We can meet you there.'

'It may only cause him more stress if we approach directly.' J'onn warned. 'We need to deal with him carefully. I don't think he is likely to attack without provocation- all I sense is pain and some confusion.'

'The Justice League can be intimidating.' Superman agreed thoughtfully. He hated it whenever he tried having a conversation with someone as Superman the first thing they asked him was about his powers, with the exception of Batman who during one of their early encounters had smugly told the Kryptonian he had already studied, categorised and come up with methods to counteract his powers: namely the use of Kryptonite. Their friendship was most certainly unique.

'Let me go with Diana,' Flash saw the others turn towards him and he shrugged. 'I can be there in a-'

Green Arrow groaned from where he was in the compound 'don't say it…'

'Flash!' Wally West grinned at his team mates hopefully, despite the cringing reaction to the bad pun. Black Canary rolled her eyes before thanking the director who promptly ran back to his offices and began snatching his work back from Oliver Queen who made sour faces as he tried to decipher the technical lingo.

'The robot was trying to not directly harming anyone according to the director,' Black Canary shrugged 'but if we go in too strong he might get defensive.'

'If he's hostile Superman and Flash can give you back up instantly otherwise our E.T.A will be approximately ten minutes after we finish studying the remains here. That should be enough time. Be patient.' Batman warned Wally with a quick glance before looking up into the air at the faint outline of the Amazon in the distance. 'Good luck, Diana.'

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'What is your name?' Diana asked softly landing next to the robot. It turned its head around stiffly before standing up in shock and promptly tripping over its own feet landing with a loud bang on his rear end. The Amazon Princess couldn't help but laugh. She had expected something, graceful, perhaps someone thinking itself omnipotent- not the clumsy very every day human en-souled creation before her.

'**_I… uh… Wonder Woman?'_ **Even without much distinction in the level in his voice, Diana smiled at the genuine surprise the robot had displayed.

'Call me Diana.' She looked on relief that she hadn't been attacked and no small amount of amusement as the robot took a swift step backwards and made the human gesture of rubbing the back of his head. He started suddenly as the clear sound of metal scratching sounded in the air and there was a slight glow in his eyes as he replied.

'**_I'm Xander. Xander Harris. You know like short for Alexander and stuff. Oh boy…' _**Xander gazed in disbelief at the famed Amazon super-heroine. Sure, Buffy saved the world a lot but she didn't exactly do the whole spandex deal and wear the stars and stripes. Sunnydale seemed so detached from the rest of the world, it was like everything passed by over their heads and didn't quite seem real. However he did know one thing. If a member of the Justice League was here it meant trouble. And if she was here for him… oh boy.

'Do you know what happened, Xander?' Diana asked curiously but with sympathy for the young soul trapped within.

'**_I was cursed by a Mage Demon, other than that I'm thinking this is a really weird dream slash nightmare except there would probably be a vampire in it by now…' _**He then grumbled to himself**_ 'and knowing my luck it would be dead boy…'_**

'You were fighting a demon?' Wonder Woman felt a pang as she realised this was probably someone on their side who had felt the misfortune. Too many times she remembered the curses and deaths that came with the responsibilities.

'**_Trying,'_** the robot sighed. '**_As you can see I didn't do that great.'_**

'To be cursed you must have caused some harm to make them want vengeance.' Xander felt his self esteem rise as the Amazonian warrior pierced his red eyed gaze with sapphire orbs of her own. The wisdom and respect in her aura showed she did not take matters like this lightly.

'I am unfamiliar with the "mage" demon of which you speak… but perhaps there is a way we might be able to help you…?'

'**_We_?**' Xander looked up in surprise.

'The Justice League,' Diana spoke with a serious expression but the relieved grin still tugged at her lips. He reminded her too much of Flash.

'**_Th- they're here?_**' As Xander put a hand next to a tree he jumped back as a red beam of light shot from a small slit on the backhand of his gauntlet, just above his knuckles. The beam cut down a sapling just to the right of the warrior princess and he looked on, aghast, as her face darkened in thought although it could easily perceived as threatening.

'It's okay.' She reassured him, suddenly aware he was backing away.

'**_I'm really sorry I don't know how I keep triggering these laser thingymajiggies, when I wanted to get out they sort of went off automatically and I ran for it and I didn't hurt anyone did I?_**' Diana shook her head, partly allaying his fears and partly in disbelief. Bruce's expression would be entertaining to watch when she introduced them. Panic temporarily alleviated, Xander continued '**_That's good because otherwise I might not be having a nice conversation with you and I'm babbling aren't I?'_**

'A little,' Diana inclined her head before frowning momentarily 'We can help you with controlling the technology. We have adequate facilities and knowledge housed in the watchtower which might be able to tell us more about your situation as well as experts who might be able to find a way to reverse this. You are experienced in dealing with the supernatural?'

Xander stared at her, at it was then Xander came to the realisation that in this shell he couldn't even _blink_. Burying yet another wave of depression within himself he joked '**_Hey I'm- I_ was**-' He barely paused to let the implications of that correction to sink in '**_just a Californian construction worker who battled evil part time…_**' He then fully understood the implications of what Wonder Woman had suggested, '**_The watchtower?_**'

'Yes.' Diana finally let the wide grin escape and she felt sure the robot would have liked to have grinned in return 'The Watchtower.'

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**Sorry about the delay, I've had some unexpected things come up recently so I haven't had time to write. I hope this chapter meets expectations again, please let me know what you think. It was difficult to handle the relationships properly and I've had to lengthen the pace longer than planned. I kept this part in the League's perspective so I don't need to write pages and pages of Xander angst. Angst is good but in small doses. It'll probably come up later. Hope people think this up to standard. Review please! It gives me motivation to buckle down and get the chapters done.**

**I've just thought of the ending for it so I have a clear direction to head in, now it's the getting there that will be the difficult part. This could become very long… but I promise I'll keep at it.**

**Quick question: I know that the Scooby gang have referred to themselves as Scoobies but does anyone know which episode the term first appeared? I'd appreciate it.**

**Finally, my reviewers. I really, really appreciate every comment. I may have received some interesting viewpoints about the quotation marks (my only gripe is that it's not bad grammar, I should know, otherwise my grades would have gone down in my exams and they _are_ used in published books) but I've been astounded by the positive repsonse. I also want to thank everyone who put me on their alert list and thank you again to micheal68 for the idea. **


	4. But with crime, not chess

The next few chapters are very character orientated, and there is a little more on Xander's thoughts at the current time. I hope I've been accurate with my portrayals and a few more plans have come to mind as to where I'll be leading with this. I'm fairly happy with how I want it to go (a long way into the future, and I mean a long way) and I think it's fairly obvious I'm not a huge action writer. I find psychological aspects and relationships much more fascinating, but I'm not going to neglect the chance of a good ol' fashioned punch up when our favourite characters have to live with the repercussions of it. I'm also known to write comedy pieces in the realm of DC but this will be darker. I'm having lots of fun creating my evil guy at the moment. Bad guys are great to write… anyway I hope you enjoy the latest update and it meets expectations. Characters and main story theme (i.e. Xander the robot) not mine. Dialogue mine except one line by GL this chapter.

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'Batman?'

'Diana.'

'I've made contact. Alexander is confused but he's been very considerate. I assume you've been monitoring the frequency.'

'Yes. How do you know what he has said is the truth he's an android-'

'I believe him. He still has a very human soul; I can sense the truth of his words.'

Diana smirked slightly as she heard grumbling over the comm. 'We'll bring the Jet around.' There was a noise in the background before Batman amended slightly sourly '_I'll_ bring the jet around. GA you're walking.' Wonder Woman chuckled in amusement as she realised Ollie must have overstepped the line when it came to mocking the Dark Knight. '

'See you soon,' Diana said sweetly, teasing him. The only reply was a grunt as she closed the communications and turned back to the droid in question. She watched Xander with a smile as he was obliviously lost in his own thought.

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Xander had trouble breathing as Wonder Woman stepped away from him to speak to her team mates. Then he remembered he couldn't even breath, God, he couldn't even panic or freak out properly. Even vampires had the option to breathe if they _wanted_…

Right. That was it.

Enough with the morbid. He knew it was bad if he started comparing himself to vampires evil _or_ the two "reformed" ones. He didn't need to make it any worse for himself by thinking about how many things he couldn't do. He couldn't even go to the bathroom. Well, that _could_ be a bonus… somewhat. No B.O. either. He sighed again dejectedly. The only thing he could come up with to cheer up himself was toilet humour. He liked to think he was more sophisticated.

He couldn't feel sorry for himself. He'd deal. So, look on the bright side, he wouldn't have to worry about how inhaling vampire dust was bad for your health…. He'd done the right thing… he had. He'd protected Buffy. Although, if honest with himself he knew Buffy would have survived without him… _And_ he was back in a morbid circle again.

He _wasn't_ the morbid one. Giles usually dealt the cheery "world's coming to an end and we're all going to die" speeches. Anya used to… he shook his head trying to shake away the memories. It would never have worked between them. And back _again_ to moping.

He'd nearly died… what? Over a hundred times by now, with absolutely no exaggeration? He could handle it. Even if one of his best dreams ever (Wonder Woman even saying hi to him in his dreams made it top ten) was combined with one of his weirdest nightmares. And what was up with the glowy red eyes and the Normandy hat thing? Whoever thought that was twenty first century styling… he then snorted, which sounded like a rasping static, as he realised it was alien. He was inside alien technology. However it wasn't quite star trek. At this rate he wasn't going to live long or prosper if he carried on being a walking laser beam disaster waiting to happen.

Xander kicked a shrub in defiance and frustration at his situation. As he scuffed up the turf, it occurred to him as he stared down at his round block-like feet, that if this was a alien droid capable of travelling thousands of miles… and it had arrived without much sign of ship anywhere... and if his android shell was like anything the robots the League fought on TV all of the time… then he could… in theory… fly?

His thoughts flared in excitement as he crowed silently, studying the bottom of his foot by hopping around on one leg. He craned his neck downwards, stiffly, and was disappointed just to see thin grooves running across his soles. Maybe there was some sort of mechanism… as he inspected his feet all thought of flight distracted him from the bizarre situation he had found himself in. He was so excited, he yelped and tripped again as he heard a soft chuckle from Wonder Woman nearby.

Diana grinned as she walked back to where the droid stood. 'Try not to be too alarmed as my colleagues will be arriving-' Xander jerked in alarm as the Flash appeared in a scarlet blur next to the Amazonian as she finished, somewhat tired with Wally's antics, 'shortly.'

Flash ignored her tone of voice and asked lightly 'what's up?'

'**_Yah! Umm. Hi_**.' Xander said embarrassed.

'Sorry 'bout that.' Flash apologised with a grin. He asked curiously 'So you're a normal guy in a robot suit?'

'**_Yeah it's getting kind of itchy._**' Xander tilted his head and shrugged.

'I guess its brand manufacture.' Flash said conversationally but with a renewed smile of excitement at someone who shared his kind of humour. Wonder Woman shook her head, resigned to the child like behaviour of the League member.

'_**Gotta love walmart**,_' Xander agreed, holding his head crookedly as he examined the Scarlet Speedster, judging his character.

'Wow someone who actually has his sense of humour. I guess statistically it must have to happen sometime.' An amused Green Lantern called from above.

All three looked up in anticipation as the next arrivals came. Martian Manhunter and Superman, carrying Black Canary, sailed over the hilltop along with the ring bearer and slowly descended next to their team-mates and the stunned silver android.

'**_Whoa.'_** If he had ever been the Zeppo before, he was now at the bottom of the barrel for feelings of uselessness. He didn't think they were a donuts kind of people.

'Be calm my friend, we mean you know harm.' J'onn's flat monotone resonated through the air and reassured the nervous Scooby.

Superman smiled, having listened to the android he couldn't help but be impressed at the young man's composure and good humour. He still felt pity for him as he could perceive the uneasiness in the air between him and the League. 'Mr Harris-'

'**_Hey, it's just Xander._**' The robot interrupted the man of steel with an automatic reflex from all the times he'd rebutted the name. He then suddenly stepped back in horror as he had to register just who he was speaking to at the time. He. Was. Talking. To. Superman.

'Xander, we'd really like to find out more about your situation and see if we can help.'

'But first you can answer some questions.' Batman appeared under the shadow of the surrounding trees having landed the jet stealthily a few yards away. Xander was visibly relieved to see he wasn't the only one to jump out of his skin at the dark knight's presence. Superman shrugged apologetically for his friend as Bruce continued, waiting to scrutinise his replies. Even if the young man had been panicking he might have asked for help instead of getting away from the people that may have been able to help most with the situation and housed the most knowledge about the robot shell. Batman had surmised earlier that Xander was clearly more intelligent than he let on, or at least more world weary. 'Why did you break out?'

'**_I'm um.' _**It was Batman. Weird dream again…**_ 'I don't like labs or military bases very much. And this place is a big sour smoothie mixed up with both.' _**The League looked at him oddly and Xander shuffled slightly, embarrassed again **_'The metaphors work better when I speak normally.'_**

'Eh, these guys aren't the best audience, they don't appreciate good work.' Flash leant back with a grin; he really liked this Xander guy.

Green Lantern rolled his eyes. 'That's because you aren't funny.'

'**_Hey you're better than Giles. He's has weird Britishy humour and stuff' _**Xander felt his heart sink further down into the ground as he wondered what his friends were doing and thinking, then he suddenly thought how that was possible because at best he just had a battery in the centre of him. **_'Giles! The others! I have to let them know I'm ok, well, ok-ish but definitely not in the land of the dead.' _**He shook his head as another realisation hit him hard enough like he'd just been three rounds with Glory.**_ 'Or un-dead. Oh man…' _**

'What?' Flash knitted his eyebrows together in concern.

'**_I don't even know if I'm dead!' _**Xander exclaimed exasperatedly. It came out sounding petulant to the League as Xander became more absorbed in working out what had happened. See, if his brain was here and if his body was dead would that mean he was un-dead? Stay positive, stay positive, stay positive… he chanted to himself. His body might just be in a coma or something. Something other than a coma? He shook his head. Dead or coma. Neither sounded appealing.

'The dead don't usually walk around.' Superman scratched his chin in a little amusement at Green Lantern's rebuttal but didn't comment. It _was_ true for the majority of the population.

'**_Try taking a vacation in Sunnydale.'_** Xander challenged while still thinking the same thing. _I might be dead. Ish._

'The dead walk around in Sunnydale?' Black Canary tried to clarify the flippant speech.

'**_When I was in high school I nearly accidentally joined a gang who initiated its members by killing them and then resurrecting them, kind of like zombies._**' Xander tried to explain further, as the stares he received were even stranger '**_I live on the Hellmouth_**.'

'Zombies?' Green Arrow stumbled into the clearing, red faced from jogging, and glared icily at Batman.

'**_Oi…_**' Xander put his head in his hands. This could take some explaining.

* * *

Again the pace is longer than I'd thought but I'm getting around to explaining stuff. The League are going to take their time, he might not have fought with them but it doesn't mean they trust him yet. I hope this piece runs smoothly as I wrote several pieces of dialogue and then had to string them together. Next chapter should get a little more interesting. So again I hope you enjoy this and please review! Thankyou to anyone and everyone who has already or/and put me on their alert list. Greatly appreciated. Keep reviewing! 


	5. Yesterday my life's 'uh, oh, pop quiz'

I will be writing the Scooby gang a little but this will mainly focus on Xander dealing with the League, they will come into the picture much greater later on though. Ok angsty stuff here. I'm slightly worried if it's too strong or not, can you let me know? I'm not an angst sort of person, usually. I'm also not sure how often I'll be updating as I have a personal investigation due in for art where I'm looking at the work of Terry Gilliam and Heinz Edelmann (The guy who designed the film Yellow Submarine and if you don't know who Terry Gilliam is… grr…) I laugh quietly (but not meanly) at those who choose boring topics. You know, I feel quoting Monty Python is quite appropriate as this is quite a surreal story. "Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!" Don't blame me, blame caffeine. And skittles. Additives do weird things… it's why they got rid of blue Smarties dammit.

I do not own the characters. Special credit to michael68!

* * *

On the scratched wooden floor of the magic box, which had played battleground to many fights, Buffy cradled her fallen friend, shaking him gently as she felt his essence ebb away. Silent tears slid down her cheek as she felt his weak pulse beat against her, but she knew deep down that he'd gone. He wasn't dead yet, but he wasn't… there. Even after burying his head in a book, asleep after another research party he would always have a quirk to his eyebrow or incoherent mumble that made him alive. Not the pale and motionless blue tinged face in front of her, eyes almost frozen shut. The spark that made him Xander was gone, stolen by the deceased mage demon that lay next to her, the oozing purple blood staining the floor.

She couldn't save her best friend… after everything that had happened. Even Glory and her own death… she then realised how much of their survival counted on dumb luck. Xander's dumb luck. And now they didn't have that anymore. Buffy wasn't aware of how much time passed before she looked up hollowly as the shop's bell sounded. When she saw who it was she felt her heart crack a little more as the situation greeted her friend in the typical Sunnydale fashion. No warning, just a stumble into the wrong door. The smile on her best friend's face fell faster than a bolt of lightning could have struck her.

'Xander!' Willow ran from the shop door to her two best friends, an expression of pure horror and anguish spread across the young witch's face. She cried unashamedly, her hair catching in her mouth, before a sudden thirst for revenge rose within her. A dark flash raced across her eyes before she met Buffy's gaze, demanding answers silently.

'I-.' Buffy took a breath to gather herself as she stared back at Xander's lifeless body 'I tried to save him, she was in the middle of cursing him so I killed her and he seemed fine but then he just collapsed and he -he's not there anymore.' Buffy's voice caught as she relived it again.

'I'll find him.' The red headed witch promised softly, hugging her friend. Eyes still ebony beneath her shut eyelids she whispered 'I'll find him.'

* * *

'**_And that concludes Hellmouth 101…_**' Xander finished his explanation, strangely not tired at having spoken at breakneck pace for the last ten minutes about what the underground population in Sunnydale really got up to. He tilted his head at the League's stunned expressions before adding '**_next class it'll be things not to say on a Hellmouth some of which includes the "Wish" word, "oh God, I'm bleeding" and "bite me."_**

There was a pregnant pause as the team of heroes adjusted to the new situation… and the bad joke. Or was it a joke? Even Batman was not completely certain either way.

'So you really grew up around all of that? Why isn't it in the news?" Flash asked eventually, confused. If it was real – and both J'onn and Diana confirmed it was – then why on earth had the League not been called in?

'You're actually asking a sensible question Flash?' GL looked at the League's youngest member in surprise.

'Well seeing as no one else has yet…' Flash shrugged and grinned wickedly as he received identical glares from his counter parts.

'**_There's this little thing called Sunnydale syndrome. Vampire injuries are usually classed as accidents or the result of a gang attack. No one in town seems to notice anything, they'll make up memories so it fits in with their view of reality. That and the fact that up until a couple of years ago the mayor used to cover everything major up._**'

'Used to?' Black Canary asked, curious.

'**_He "ascended" and turned into a giant demon snake at my High School Graduation._**' Xander shrugged slightly as some of the heroes raised their eyebrows at him. '**_I don't think finishing the paperwork was really an issue anymore._**'

'How did you become involved in fighting these demons if people in your town just ignore them?' Superman frowned bringing the conversation back to topic; there were many things the young man was leaving out.

'You witnessed an attack and decided to take action.' Diana observed, ignoring Clark's glance at her, she knew a warrior when she met one and they did not simply forget what they see.

If Xander had his lip he would have chewed right through it before deciding to explain some parts of his history. He could trust them, but it might be wiser to tell them about Buffy later. '**_Near enough. I'm not much of a fighter, but I do my best to help my friends out when they need it…_**' He looked down for a moment, knowing that he could ask to call them, but he had no idea whether they'd recognise his voice. Willow would want to help, but she was overcoming her magic addiction and he could never ask. He didn't need to be selfish. He'd get a message to them later or something. He raised his head '**_they're good at what they do,_**'

'We may discuss this later,' Superman spoke with an edge of warning, 'If the hellmouth really endangers that many people so frequently we need to make sure it is properly protected.'

'**_It is_**,' Xander replied, surprising Clark with his certainty. Superman gave a nod of approval for his loyalty and assurance before waiting for Batman's view. The Dark Knight had remained surprisingly silent, even for him.

'A centre of mystical convergence…' Batman shook his head slightly and muttered to himself, recalling the information Xander had haphazardly given him. His mind was already working on overdrive while the others were talking. It made sense to a degree. He knew there was a population of demons living among the world's populace but it looked like he had greatly underestimated their numbers; and activities. A mistake he could not, and would not make again. Hellmouths… he really did hate the supernatural. He cleared his throat gruffly to draw attention to himself and stared directly at Xander. 'We will help you, under the condition you allow J'onn to help you control-' the android cringed as Green Arrow had to duck to avoid a sudden deadly ray of red light erupting from his arm. 'these abilities.'

'**_Thank you… but, uh,_** **_how?_**' Xander asked, confused. Trying to keep his hands pointed safely at the Earth, away from the team of heroes.

_By allowing me into your mind. I can guide you and help you to learn to control the matrix linking you with your mechanical body. _J'onn's pupil-less eyes gleamed. Xander nodded silently, surprised how instantly soothing those words to his mind were as the Martian stepped forward and placed a hand on the top of his forehead. Feeling himself sinking into darkness, Xander began to panic but he was reassured silently by the Martian before he spoke quietly _we have arrived._

Xander blinked. He ran his hand over his head through his… hair! He had hair. He looked at his arms and noticed all the small nicks and scars, like the small on his finger that he'd gotten during his failed raid of the cookie jar when he was six. He felt cloth on his skin and noticed he was wearing his favourite battered T-shirt with slacks, even the scuffed trainers he hadn't been bothered to throw away from High school. Running in them_ had_ saved his life a few times. It was him at his most comfortable and he liked it.

He glanced upwards and his jaw dropped at finding himself standing on a small disc shaped platform, part of an intricate string of interconnecting levels, a red hue glowing against the pitch black background that seemed endless, the bridges seemed to be made out of thin scarlet air yet Xander knew them to be almost impenetrable. He didn't know how, but he just did, something about the structure of the place seemed so… _strong _and safe. Wait… what had the green guy said? This was his mind. But if this was his mind then where were… he grinned as he spotted the twinkies laid out on a small alter on a platform not too far away. And was that a bottle of Gatorade? Ooh… donuts… but where were the sprinkles? He sighed. Even here he couldn't make things easier for himself.

He continued to stare silently around him for a few moments but at the light touch on his shoulder he spun around to come face to face with the Martian. J'onn's unchanging expression was a cool reminder to him that this wasn't real. The wacky nightmare outside was.

'This is the centre of your mind, through those doors are different aspects of your personality and memories you hold connected with them. The centre path should lead to your cerebral matrix which I can teach you to control and get used to as it has been severely altered from average human parameters.'

'Severely altered?' Xander exclaimed worriedly.

'Do not be alarmed, I merely meant it is… different… it is not harmful to any of your memories or personality,' The deep voice explained.

'Twinkie craving, check.' Xander grinned, enjoying being able to express himself, giving the Martian a salute. J'onn J'onnz raised an eyebrow, sceptically.

'You are an unusual human.'

'Eh, you should meet the other Scoobies.' Xander shrugged.

'Scoobies?' It was rare for the telepath to be so confused.

'I guess the Watchtower doesn't get the cartoon channel.' Xander shook his head sadly, as he followed J'onn further down the red bridges of light to where the door waited. He thought with amusement, 'who knew they'd be so deprived.'

'I believe we do receive… Disney…' J'onn spoke with the usual baritone in answer to Xander's thought, and if he had turned to face the Scooby might have seen a small knowing grin on his face. The Martian paused for a moment as he reached the heavy metal door and pushed it open, revealing his cerebral matrix. He touched Xander on the shoulder lightly to relieve him of his awe at the beauty of the landscape. 'Let us begin our work.'

* * *

Ok, this has yet again extended the pace, but I'm outlining my plot at the moment and I have written some scenes that will come in waaaay later on. I feel really bad for not updating and I want to thank everyone who has reviewed its great for a boost to get me working. However it _is_ kind of a low proportion to how many hits I've had and I just want to ask, please review! Even a word will let me know if you like or hate. I just want to improve my work. Yeah, yet again the tone is different for the second part but I hope it meshes and people enjoy. I just figure that Xander doesn't realise the impact he has on the Scoobies, yet, anyway. Things should get moving a little faster next chapter and I promise I'll update as soon as I can get it ready. 


	6. Today it's 'Rain of Toads'

Hey, I've finally got another chapter ready for you guys. The longest by far, this is also my fifth version (I was working on it! My other chapters usually end up with about three different ones) because the first few included a load of really cheesy lines and bad descriptions. This is basically a mesh and re-editing of the four other drafts I wrote and it's bigger because I wanted to do the whole later scene in one go although I did seriously consider splitting it in two. I also actually found a whole load of other material that had been hanging around and used bits and pieces of the dialogue from that. If anyone wants to BETA read my next chapter when I get it done I'd be grateful. I wasn't entirely sure what was working and what wasn't but I still hope people enjoy. Thanks to all my reviewers. It means loads.

Disclaimer: Well I remembered. It's a bonus. These characters are not mine, with exception of original creations that may crop up, original premise of this fic is from michael68.

* * *

'Hey Bats? What are you looking so _grave_ about?' Green Arrow asked with a wicked grin as he climbed into the jet. Resting on the silver dashboard, his resentment for running the two kilometres was temporarily set aside as he resumed a favourite past time of the League's: Bat baiting. An extremely difficult challenge to get an adverse reaction, and almost certainly a death sentence, or something close, but found to be extremely rewarding by the more juvenile members of the League. And, unfortunately for the Batman, not just those still in their twenties

'Queen,' Batman growled in annoyance. He still resented the archer's running and unfortunately very descriptive commentary about his temperament and dress being comparative to that of a funeral director. The last pun had sealed Ollie's fate of being stuck on monitor duty for the next two shifts. On the day he was supposed to be taking Black Canary out for a meal _and_ on the boring as hell graveyar- _dammit_. The _late_ shift… The day he paid any attention to Green Arrow… Bruce consoled himself with the grim satisfaction that Queen didn't know his fate just yet.

'You're running a background check already?' Oliver crossed his arms accusingly as he observed the dark knight searching through countless files from the small town of Sunnydale California, temporarily diverting the archer's interest. Receiving an inevitable silence, the archer spoke again. 'Why? We met the kid less than twenty minutes ago. 'Sides J'onn will know if he's completely trustworthy after doing his thing.'

That was another thing they had neglected to mention to their new ally, that J'onn was also unbeknownst to him would know his credibility- it was a side effect of the main intention of aid, but with the amount of times people had tried to infiltrate their way into the team it had to be known... Some of the methods the JLA employed could never be described as purely altruistic. Even Superman had acknowledged they needed to keep their security tight even if it did leave a bad taste in his mouth when they'd discussed it telepathically. They were there to help. Sighing quietly to himself, Batman explained, 'I want to know what he is capable of dealing with and how much danger is really posed to the population of Sunnydale before we commit ourselves completely...'

He paused for a moment and blinked at the screen is surprise. And there wasn't much that surprised Batman.

'What?' Green Arrow leant forward to read over Batman's shoulder the stats displayed on the screen. 'Wow, that's got to be almost as bad as Gotham, half the kids in schools don't make it to graduation.' There was another pause as they thought back to the flippant conversation. 'He really wasn't kidding.'

'These death statistics match those of towns and cities in war zone areas at times.' Batman grunted, ignoring the jibe about his hometown. While bigger, Gotham didn't have the percentage this small city had, even the last time Joker had broken free of Arkham. 'We- or the authorities- should have been informed years ago.'

'But we weren't?' Ollie grew concerned as he thought of all the problems the League might have been able to help with. The lives that could have been saved.

'No. This is more than the "Sunnydale Syndrome" Harris described. It doesn't explain why everyone on the outside ignored it too. If he is as involved as he says, then it's likely he'll know more.' Green Arrow grimaced, he could see that conversation going well, but instead of remarking he kept silent as the Dark Knight confirmed his fears in a tone the same as ever. 'Someone has been manipulating the watchtower's admin systems so we wouldn't find out about this.'

'So, uh, who exactly is this someone?' Ollie asked, humour long gone. He knew the computers and administrative systems J'onn and Bruce had designed were nigh untouchable, he should know. Not that he had been attempting any hacking at the time… but someone at_ least_ as obsessive as Batman was about justice and the Martian Manhunter about Oreos had to be responsible. There weren't exactly that many maniacs around, well, now that he thought about it, there were, but not with that reach of power anyway. And Ollie really didn't like the shortlist he could come up with. He bet the Bat didn't either.

'I intend to find out.' Batman narrowed his eyes at the computer again, before forcing GA to move out of the way with a mute glare as he strode from the plane.

'Scary,' Green Arrow muttered before he then squinted at a file Batman had left displayed on the screen. Huh. It was the monitor room roster. But then why did Bruce…? Why the conniving two-face son of a…

'HEY!' Bruce heard the strangled yell and allowed himself a minute grin before shifting into a grimmer posture as he approached the others waiting in the glade.

* * *

Xander watched in awe as crackles of blue lightning raced along silver circuits, the twisting metallic cables coming from the oblivion and interconnecting with ribbons of red spreading from where the multiple paths lay before the two. The flashing sparks illuminated the surrounding darkness creating the eerie feeling for Xander that he was being chased down by police… or something along those lines. It felt predatory, like he was being… _hunted_. It felt wrong. He didn't know what was meant to be here before, when he was in his own skin, but the metal felt intrusive and he wanted it out.

'You can not disconnect yourself from your mechanical body. If these binds were ever to be cut, your soul would be lost forever.' J'onn interrupted the thoughts and looked towards Xander, obsidian eyes intensely observing him.

'And that would be bad.' Xander agreed, sighing.

'Yes,' J'onn spoke unnecessarily, but he found it was better than to let a ghostly silence fall over the landscape. Despite the flurry of lights and flashes, there was no other sound than their voices filling the void.

And there was something else wrong. Xander felt it like an itching sensation down his spine. Beneath him, the red platform he was standing on, in front of the doorway was pulsing oddly, as it if was flowing. Xander glanced down to see a huge cluster of the thin silver and red pathways were ripped apart from each other, broken blue sparks faintly illuminating the void as the red bridges seemed to bleed downwards for eternity.

'And that would be the badness keeping me from controlling my uh…' He searched for the right word, glancing at his wrist, which was currently human. He started as it flashed silvery for a moment before turning back to his normal skin colour. He finished his sentence half heartedly. 'lasers.'

'Yes,' J'onn nodded again patiently, waiting for Xander to accept the damage that had been done.

'Sheesh...' Xander shook his head and glanced at J'onn, worried at the amount of damage he could see. Snapping out of his tired feeling he regained an aura of curiosity of bemusement. 'Seeing as this is my mind and all, shouldn't I have one hell of a headache?'

'You are in pain, my young friend, but it is not simply physical. It tears through your soul' The Martian said sadly as Xander looked down at his hands with a dark expression. 'I am here to help you repair the damage. It seems the curse was not completed and therefore failed in giving you complete control of your body. '

'But isn't that a good thing? Won't it make it easier to get back to my body? I'm sure

Wills…' He corrected himself. '_Tara _could find a spell or something' He paused and frowned at the wires. 'I don't want to attach myself to that.'

'Your friends are magicians?' J'onn asked curiously.

'Wiccan witches.' Xander answered brushing aside the distraction, still hoping for a positive answer.

'I do not believe it would be wise to wait for such a solution to present itself.' The alien felt the glimmer of hope in the man's eyes fade and he spoke morosely, hating to discourage such optimism but the damage appeared far worse than he had originally thought.

'So what- Argh!' Xander yelled, falling to one knee, clutching his head. He watched aghast as a streak of purple materialised, slicing through one of his other lifelines and another of his bridges began to melt away into the nothingness of the void. J'onn stepped forward and rested a hand on his shoulder to help him to his feet.

'If we cannot heal these connections your consciousness will drift from this body… you will die.' J'onn warned bluntly, unsure if Xander was aware of the gravity of his situation.

So there it was. The phrase "you will die". And oddly, rather than making Xander feel more depressed and freaked out about his current situation, it made him strangely resilient; it was familiar and kind of reassuring and he was sure he'd be needing therapy after the next apocalypse. It gave him a purpose and something to fight against.

Shrugging nonchalantly at J'onn as a reply as he considered the revelation some more, he thought it might as well figure. Magic –especially interrupted magic – came with a price. He'd discovered the fine print himself through doing it the hard way and in several times and ways. Or maybe it was just because it was him being dumb. Either way he was royally screwed when it came to major mojo, curses and incantations death really wasn't surprising… but maybe he should practice at avoiding these situations more. He was never going to mention the one of the latest incidents when he was nearly "Queen of the underworld" to anyone. Ever. Buffy hadn't exactly been ecstatic he'd put Dawn in jeopardy again, even by accident...He'd thought it was a good dancing demon! He noticed J'onn was looking at him oddly, well as odd a look a Martian could give. Oh right… telepath in his_ head_. Oops. Heh. He coughed slightly before asking 'But we_ can_, right?'

'..yes.' The Martian finally answered, surprised, but respectful of the quick acceptance.

Xander nodded again reluctantly, as if deep in serious thought. He turned to J'onn. 'Do you know what the day is today?'

'I believe it is Tuesday,' J'onn answered, with a glint of humour passing over his eyes.

'Well that explains everything.' Xander spoke conversationally, earning a smile from the alien. He scratched his head as he turned to the surreal black landscape stretched out before him. 'So how exactly do we fix this again?'

* * *

J'onn cautiously followed the path down and focused his mind, attempting to alter the flow beneath his feet. He nodded, satisfied, as a bridge suddenly diverted course and latched onto it's electronic opposite, moulding itself to fit the slot in the metal. The boy's mind was eager to assist. He had to admire his desire to overcome any obstacle.

'Whoah- head rush,' Xander called out from where he watched nearby. He steadied himself as he felt a wave of dizziness befall him and blinked in surprise as his thoughts cleared. 'I feel… smarter?'

'Once the connections are completed you will have gained access to much of the robot's memory banks including technical expertise.' J'onn informed him as he moved swiftly to repair another connection.

'I _am_ smarter?' Xander spoke, somewhat mystified as to how this techno-magic-telepathy worked even after hanging around Willow and Giles for years. 'Cool.' He shook his head to clear his thoughts, and stared down at the bleeding pathway as it faded to nothing. 'So all I have to do is focus and try and control my mind…'

'Yes, this is your domain; you merely have to will it to happen. You do not require telepathic abilities.' The Martian Manhunter reassured him.

'Ok, ok I got this.' Xander grinned with confident bravado as the path abruptly obeyed his hand gesture and moved to interlock with the cyber infused bridge. Then it stuck Xander frowned in confusion. It wouldn't budge. In a moment of intense foreboding, he watched a cloud of purple something start to swirl into being, blockading his efforts. Gulping as a dark form rose in front of him he turned to the telepath. 'Uhh… J'onn?'

'The curse is beginning to actively fight our interference,' J'onn managed to gasp for breath as he fought off another deadly purple apparition- he couldn't see it quite clearly- and more of the_ things_ were forming around him. 'There are only a few connections left- once we have sealed the bonds the curse will take full effect and your soul should be safe. You must hurry!'

Xander looked back to where he had tried to fix the small bridge only to come face to face with a malevolent purple wraith, sharp claws and white eyes shining. It loomed over him, the skeletal and almost humanoid body tensed. The leathery wings beat down fiercely to intimidate the Scooby. He vaguely recalled reading about demons who failing to live corporeally in this world could be summoned from their dimension to control, move or even take over a person's mind. But that didn't matter right now. What mattered was dealing with the demon before he got his head ripped off. He decided to do the thing the creature would least expect.

'Hey! Purple demon thing! Look over there!' He pointed abruptly to the far left of the demonic form. To his complete astonishment the demon seemed to stumble around confused by the order. Obviously inter-dimensional demons weren't too bright. 'Wow it actually worked…' Xander muttered before summoning his thoughts and pushing the bridge through the belly of the distracted monster and into the silver connection.

The demon shrieked ear-splittingly; its translucent purple frame shredded into ribbons of cloud whilst the blue sparks crackled beneath Xander's feet transferring the alien knowledge to Xander's mind. After a moment's dizziness the Scooby groaned as he noticed the cloud drift together again, quickly reforming into the demonic beast. 'But I hate it when they do that.'

Ducking as a clawed arm lashed out at him Xander sprinted back along the paths until he caught up with J'onn, only to stumble to a standstill, watching stunned as the Martian Manhunter slung one of the wraiths that had latched onto him over his shoulder and tumbling into the pit. Steady opaque eyes met dark ones. 'I will distract them. Go.'

Nodding once, Xander immediately spun on his heel. There were only three he needed to fix. Three connections and five violet magic spawned demons waiting for him to make his move. But there was no way that he would let them win. No matter what. Glancing back at J'onn he grinned. It was handy having a new friend. With Xander watching him in awe and respect, the Martian Manhunter transformed into an emerald tentacle covered alien beast from his home-world, lashing out with razor sharp accuracy until a path was cleared. J'onn probed his thoughts slightly to urge him to act before he was too distracted by other remnants of the curse forming to attack to overwhelm him.

Xander sent J'onn a wave of gratitude before making his way down the path as quickly as he could, trying as best as he could to ignore the cries as J'onn commenced in battle. He had made it nearly half way until…

_Uh oh. _

The spectres which J'onn had dispersed had set about reforming already but they didn't separate. They grew bigger. And bigger…

The fog melded together and rose up higher than the Sunnydale resident would have thought possible. The megalithic monster loomed over him, easily eclipsing him in its shadow. An inhuman shriek of anger erupted from its throat and it lumbered towards Xander, the gigantic clawed feet rocking the foundations of the red pathways that had seemed so strong. The twisted bony limbs glistened in the dim light, gathering the darkness around it into an aura of menace.

_Uh oh. _Xander repeated. _Not good. _He glanced to J'onn but saw he was busy with his own problems. So he'd handle this himself. Turning to stare into the vacant eyes, he was almost transfixed until his survival instinct finally caught up with his brain._ Run!_

Narrowly avoiding the lethal slash, he sprinted across the bridge and skidded down the path to the last of the broken bridges, waving his arms comically in the air as he screeched to a standstill at the end of the bridge. He could hear the beast advancing behind him and gathered his thoughts. He may as well go for the triple at once. No time for anything else. Breathing deeply, he tried to keep calm as the three red paths rose slowly in front of him and he was nearly within the grasp of the monstrous creature. With one final release they shot forward and slotted together with the cyber counterparts and in a strange twist of fate, as Xander keeled over backwards from the rush of the information sliding into his brain the indigo talon swiped the thin air where his neck had been before bursting into a purple mist and dissipating into nothing.

Xander breathed a welcome sigh of relief.

He wasn't going to die today.

Mission accomplished.

Then he snapped back to reality with a bump.

* * *

Please tell me what you think. This one was a real pain in the neck and I want to improve my fight scenes. I hope you like my first attempt at serious action writing, I really want to know how I can improve on it for the future so any advice would be much appreciated. However, there should be a fun conversation in more familiar territory coming up soon in the next few chapters when a Scooby comes a-calling. That's about the only hint you're getting.

In answer to queries and objections: I figured last chapter J'onn _would_ know the Scooby Doo cartoon reference, it was just something he would consider irrelevant to the conversation and situation ergo causing confusion as to why Xander would mention it at all (he was not entirely familiar with Xander's personality traits or that the gang is called the Scooby gang, this chapter establishes an understanding and trust between the two). And the " Normandy hat thing" is in reference to the knights of Normandy on the Bayeux tapestry (or if it helps classic Robin Hood villain henchman style sort of- see first chapter for full description) Thanks King Henry the V for pointing out the errors, now fixed.


	7. I'm finished being everyone's buttmonkey

This is a lot later than I thought it would be because of problems beyond the realm of fan fiction- writers block, computer viruses, actual viruses and Easter amongst the chief of them and then exams (which are still ongoing so I may have to focus a little on that). I needed a break, but now I'm back and vigorously getting myself into an author's mindset. I'll have plenty more time over the summer in which I intend to carry on writing. Thank you to everyone reading for being patient with me and I hope you guys like the next chapter.

Special and grateful thanks to Bumpkin for BETA reading this chapter, it really helped. Let me know what you think of the improved version.

Disclaimer: I guess I am supposed to make some derogatory comment on the complete lack of necessity of the disclaimer because there is a more realistic chance of me owning the characters than there is of me being sued by the people who own the characters as I highly doubt they'd spend time reading this and I'm a student with no money currently listening to Bob Dylan. Anyway at long last… back to the story.

* * *

The hospital room was cold and quiet as the evening drew on. Dawn was sitting close to Buffy who was asleep uncomfortably in her chair. Dry eyed but with tear tracks still staining her cheeks, Dawn stared at where Xander lay. She'd already lost her mother- and her sister more than once- she couldn't lose him too. She didn't think she could take anymore. Seeing him pale faced and lifeless, completely lifeless, despite what the Doctors said. It made her feel helpless. She had watched in horror as it had taken everything all of Tara's compassion and understanding to calm Willow as she raged, having watched her oldest friend fall. As far as the Summers girl knew they were both at the Magic box researching everything and anything that might help. She didn't think they wanted to wait around for the worst to happen. So what was she doing here?

A quiet tapping interrupted her thoughts. Dawn glanced up in surprise and relief as she saw Spike standing outside the room, peering through the shutters and jerking his head in a signal to meet outside. With slightly more cheerfulness Dawn crept around her sister and bounded up to meet the vampire.

'Spike!' She breathed out in relief as she shut the door behind her, wincing as she saw Buffy stir slightly.

'You ok, Nibblet?' He asked; a serious expression in his eyes.

Dawn squirmed slightly under Spike's knowing gaze. 'Yeah, but it's just I don't know what to do…' She breathed in again deeply, her brow furrowing as the last few hours came back to her. 'Willow nearly lost it and Buffy hasn't eaten or drunk anything for hours, I mean, she seems completely numb to anything and I want- I want Xander back.'

'C'mon bit, let's go sit down,' Spike took her by the shoulders and led Dawn away to the waiting area and sighed as he dropped into one of the stiff plastic seats. He drew out a cigarette before raising an eyebrow as a member of the nursing staff who was staring at him. The nurse then glared pointedly at the no smoking sign two feet away from him in disbelief. Jabbing him in the ribs the younger Summers sister gave him a threatening glare, before she turned back smugly as he pocketed his lighter. Grumbling, he pulled at the collar of his leather jacket. 'I don't see the bloody point, it's not like there's anyone else around here who isn't already un-dead or dying,' Then at seeing the look on Dawn's face he relented. 'Oh, I didn't mean the Tosser- _Xander_. He'll be fine.' Spike suddenly seemed to grow bitter. 'He'll be fine and dandy and up about in no time telling me what a waste of space I am.'

'I don't think you're a waste of space,' Dawn spoke with an earnest smile. 'You let me ride on your bike last week.'

'If you ever tell your sister about that-' Spike warned in what Dawn recognised as his tough guy act.

'I know. I can keep a secret.' She answered, throwing her hands up mock defensively before slumping further into her seat again.

There was a pause before Spike stole a sly glance at Dawn. 'Look, I'm only here because Buffy's worried and you are too. Xander can rot for all I care- never made any secret of it, but if you need to talk about it…' He shrugged and looked away, slightly embarrassed. He was the big bad! He shouldn't mope and get all touchy feely just because Buffy was all depressed and Nibblet was too, ah damn it. She looks like she might cry again…

'It's just… he was always there, no matter what, I mean, through all the bad stuff he was always there. It's not fair,' she stamped her foot in frustration and stared down the corridor, chin resting limply on her hand.

Tentatively Spike reached an arm around her shoulders, rubbing them consolingly, in a manner that was clearly uncomfortable for him. 'Look, bit, this was a Demon who did this- and Buffy and red aren't half bad at catching these guys and all that cracking curses business. Besides, this isn't the first time the wank-, er, _Xander_ has been cursed he'll bounce back like the annoying bundle of bad jokes he is.'

'You think so?' She looked up hopefully.

'Would I lie?' The former member of the scourge of Europe said, grinning knowingly.

'Do I have to answer that?' She gave her own wide smile in return, feeling a weight slide off her chest as she continued to banter with the master vampire.

* * *

He'd thought it was worse the second time, when he landed back in his new body. He knew what he was coming back to. The wacky reality of his mind had provided some freedom, rather than the restricted sensations he had in the robot suit. Suddenly it seemed all the more appealing to retreat into a shell; to ignore reality. But when, sitting in the JLA craft they'd broken the sound barrier on their way into space he was slightly bemused that his life had suddenly found its way into being even more surreal.

He briefly thought over the last hour. Gotten a lot of funny stares as he channelled Willow babble, check; nearly set off the self destruct on the jet as they prepared to take off, check (In his defence he thought it was a CD player or something and he was fidgety). Then he'd spent the last twenty minutes again thinking about what he was going to say to the rest of the Scooby Gang and what they'd think. And Anya. Especially Anya. Stop thinking about Anya. She'd probably be happy he was cursed, considering her previous job. He'd deserve it, too. He yelled at himself silently, _Stop thinking about Anya! _

'We have arrived at the watchtower,' J'onn stirred him from his thoughts and he began to follow the League out of the ship and into the place only a few people in the world ever had the privilege to enter, _unless of course you were one of those surprisingly numerous megalomaniacs that wanted to blow it up_, Xander thought dryly. He winced as the Martian gave a hint of a smirk that showed he had overheard that particular sentiment before they stopped at a set of double doors.

'_**Wow**_,' Xander muttered quietly as he walked into the observation deck of the watchtower, a couple of League members Xander hadn't met were coming to greet their team mates as they returned from, or more accurately_ with_, the assignment. Was that Aquaman? Huh. And it was fairly obviously Hawkgirl swinging the mace absent-mindedly in her fist as she followed the Atlantean King into the chamber. Black Canary and Green arrow were already flirting as they headed towards a doorway across the large platform, admittedly one side more adamantly than the other- although Xander seriously doubted either minded. Superman and Batman having already disappeared- Superman with his heightened speed and Batman in the creepy ninja way only he could although Xander was getting scarily reminded of one certain en-souled vampire at this point. He blinked in surprise, or rather, stared wishing he could blink, as J'onn took the easiest route- through a wall. He nodded his head wryly in acceptance as the Martian imitated him in a reassuring acknowledgement.

Turning back and ignoring most of the buzz surrounding him, his nervousness was now momentarily forgotten as Xander stared down at the planet which he had helped to save so many times now. He'd never appreciated how tiny it was though, nor had he thought of how serene and beautiful it was just hanging in space. It was… peaceful. It was also an almost monumental achievement considering the last six years of his life on the hellmouth.

'Yeah, the first time you see it up here's always the best. You soon get used to it,' Flash darted to beside him, smiling. 'Looks pretty small doesn't it?'

'_**Yeah,**_' Xander replied still a little stunned by the sight; he glanced at Flash and scratched the back of his head sheepishly. '_**And I'd always figured it would be kind of stronger looking not so fragile- if you know what I mean?**_'

Flash nodded and was about to reply before he noticed Wonder Woman approach with a small smile gracing her face. 'The League are going to convene in the meeting room to discuss today's revelations, you are welcome to wait here until we call you- there are some issues that need to be addressed.'

'_**I'm good**_,' Xander said, eager to smile, but he could only make a small hand gesture of complacence, which Diana seemed to accept with a nod.

'J'onn said you performed exceptionally when fighting the curse, his praise is not to be taken lightly.' Diana spoke seriously and smiled again. 'You made quite a first impression.'

'_**Ahh and you have yet to hear of my fantastic exploits as the donut gatherer of the Scooby gang**_' Xander tilted his head and shrugged as the others merely shook their heads at him.

* * *

There has been advancement at last; beginnings are always hardest to write. Now I just have to keep going. Xander's body is in hospital, and his brain is on the watchtower. I love writing Spike. He won't feature too much into the story (he may pop up occasionally if I can manage to squeeze in any more plot bunnies) but I wanted to throw in some anti-Xander feeling. He isn't a perfect guy- far from it. He's an average person, that's the appeal. I've seen a common problem with Xander fics online here, especially crossovers. They make him a too perfect and knowledgeable good guy, not prone to any personality faults at all. Even though I love his character, he does do things wrong and he has to make amends- although you can go the other way and make everything he does a mistake. I hope I can balance it out. Let me know what you think. This was a little shorter as I know without a doubt the next one will have to be much longer. Or at least in theory. 


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